As the holiday season draws near, parents, families, and kids get many joyful thoughts, feelings, and ideas about how we are celebrating, what gifts we are going to get for our loved ones, and how much fun we can have during the winter break. There can be so much excitement and anticipation for the gifts that this season brings to our lives.

But… yes, there is always a “but” in blogs and articles. Holidays are not always “Insta-perfect holly jolly”, right?

The Holidays can bring particular challenges for divorced families, separated families, blended families, co-parenting families, two-household families, reorganized families, and shared parenting families.

Kids don’t choose divorce, and the holidays can be a tricky time for families who are co-parenting and managing different family situations.  It’s common for parents to feel stressed, emotional, or even lonely—especially if their old traditions are in the past and new traditions aren’t in place yet (Gaspard, 2023).

In two-household families, it can be stressful for your child to split time between homes or attend multiple gatherings in one day. We would suggest being a little bit more flexible and creative. Consider celebrating on a different day or starting new traditions, like opening gifts on Christmas Eve. As a parent, it’s important to ask yourself if this schedule is working for your child or if it is about your needs or your ex’s (Gaspard, 2023).

The holidays can make kids feel stuck in between loyalties with each of their parents. They might worry about making one parent sad by spending time with the other. Reassure your child that it’s okay to enjoy time with both parents. You can support your child with tricky feelings by noticing and normalizing them. For example, you can say:

“It seems like you are feeling sad because you miss Mom (or Dad). Would calling Mom (or Dad) help you feel better?”

Gaspard, T. (2023, November 21). Co-parenting during the holidays. The Gottman Institute.
https://www.gottman.com/blog/co-parenting-during-the-holidays/